The Many Types of Facebook Status Updates
What's Your Status?
Facebook is probably the most popular social networking site on the internet right now. Just about everyone who uses the internet is currently on Facebook. Some of us even have more than one profile on Facebook. So why is it so popular? I believe it has something to do with the status updates.
There is a certain art to the status update. Everyone has their own style and most people use a variety of status updates. The status updates help everyone keep in touch with each other and receive mini-updates on friends' lives. No one has to call anyone or even meet up with someone face to face anymore. You open up Facebook, read some status updates, get a sense of how life is going for your friend or relative, and then go on with your life. It is convenient and fast (and impersonal).
Since status updates are so popular, there are certain trends in status updates. Some types of status updates you can see over and over again on Facebook. I would like to explore the many types of Facebook status updates.
The Melodramatic Update
Example: "I don't know how I can continue with life this way. If something doesn't change soon, I am throwing myself off a cliff."
Aside from being called the Melodramatic Update, these updates are also known as the Drama Queen Update or the Dramatic Update. This is a person crying out for attention. These are the same people that always have some kind of real life drama going on in their lives. What the person really wants is a response from someone that goes something like this, "Oh no! What happened?"
You know what you should do? Ignore them. If your friend was really that depressed, he or she would not be putting trivial updates like this on Facebook. This is not serious. It is someone trying to suck you into their drama. Don't do it.
Fun with Facebook
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The Passive Aggressive Update
Example: "It is all that slut's fault that Fred broke up with me!"
Wait a minute.... what slut? Is there a backstory to this and we don't know about it? Of course there is a backstory! This status update is not even intended for a general audience. Chances are, "the slut" is on her friend list and she wants just that one person to read the status update. Obviously, it would be way too mature for someone to actually approach the person and say it to her face. Instead, why not just post it online?
These status updates are very similar to the Melodramatic Update, but this is geared towards just one person. The person who posted this does not have the nerve to actually approach "the slut." Instead, she will use this as a way to vent her frustrations and play the part of the victim. We'll probably never hear the other side of the story unless "the slut" confronts her online and a Facebook catfight begins.
The Mundane Update
Example: "I just went to the grocery store and bought cheese."
Wow. Really? Please, at least tell me you got it on sale or something. What a boring update. If this is the best you can do, you might want to stay away from updating anyone until you have something else to say.
The I Hate Work Update
Example: "Bob in IT just said I am playing my music too loud in my cubicle. I HATE him! Maybe he should spend more time fixing the network, which is down again, and less time judging me. Now I have another meeting and I am behind on my project again. I hate Mondays!"
Oh boy, this is a popular status update. I will admit I am really guilty about posting this type of update. Sometimes when at work, the computer is your only outlet for frustration. You have to be careful about this type of update though. You'd better have a private profile for this one. If your boss sees it, you may have more free time for Facebook while unemployed.
The My Life is So Exciting Update
Example: "Just got back from my week long Caribbean cruise. I almost don't have enough time to pack for my business trip in Florida in 2 days."
When you read these updates, don't you just want to punch a hole through the monitor? I am sure whoever posts updates like this does not realize how annoying they sound. Perhaps they've been to so many wonderful places and their lives are full of so much excitement that they do not even remember what it is like to just sit at home and read stuff like that on the computer. Sigh. At least this status update is better than a mundane one.
The Inside Joke Update
Example: "Gorillas! That is all I have to say."
Usually after a status update like this, at least a few other people respond with equally confusing comments about gorillas. Most of their responses include short sentences or just a word or two.
What are you talking about? If you are not going to share with the rest of us, stop being so annoying and using that as a status update.
The Too Much Information Update
Example: "I am still really itchy, but at least that rash is clearing up. Don't ever use the toilets at Todd's house."
Oh, wow. That was really gross, yet informative. I did need to know that if I know Todd, but why are you sharing that with the world? Is your mom on Facebook? Is your boss? Thanks for sharing, but no thanks.
The Funny Status Update
Example: "I am stuck under the computer right now. Someone come and save me!"
OK. I guess we need a little humor here and there, and why not express it on Facebook? This is sure more fun to read than most other updates.
The Lyric Status Update
Example: "I woke up this morning feeling like P. Diddy."
Oh, thanks Ke$ha, when did I friend you on Facebook? The Lyric Status Update is a way to convey a message to your friends in a poetic way by using song lyrics. Some people alter the lyrics to be creative, while other people quote directly from a song. For some reason, Ke$ha, Lady Gaga, and Kings of Leon are quoted a lot.
The Repost Status Update
Example: "If you hate cancer, repost this as your status update."
Well, that is awfully bossy. I have a different status update I want to use today. So what happens if I do not repost this? Do I seem like an insensitive, cancer-loving jerk? I assure you, I hate cancer just like everyone else, but I want the freedom to express myself however I please while using Facebook. OK. I guess I am an insensitive jerk after all. I guess I'll repost it.
The Ultimatum Status Update
Example: "I am going to clean up my friend list this weekend. If I don't hear from you by Friday, I am going to unfriend you."
Really? Is that what it comes down to now? If I don't send you a message and beg to be your friend, you are going to defriend me on Facebook? Wow. Thanks, Grandma. I thought you loved me.
The Ultimatum Status Update is quite popular with folks that have, oh, I don't know... around a thousand friends. They friend everyone, get overwhelmed, and then start weeding people out. If you don't say something nice, you are gone. Usually a person decides to do this because the status updates (probably like some listed above) have gotten out of hand. One or two people just become so annoying that others must suffer, too. Of course, it would not be so nice to just defriend the one or two offenders; just delete 100 people at once and the offender will never be offended!
The General Update
Example: "I am on Hubpages writing a hub about status updates. Thinking about going to lunch at Panera's after this. Anyone interested?"
Yes, sometimes people just have a normal status update they want to share. These updates include a normal activity and perhaps a "shout out" to friends to see if they would also like to engage in a normal activity with you. Sometimes we all get a little bored and decide to post a general update. There is nothing wrong with that. Typically, it does not cause any fights, any jealous fits, and it annoys no one.
So for now, perhaps it is time for me to sign off here and sign on to Facebook. Perhaps I will post a general status update right now!
Copyright ©2011 Jeannieinabottle
More Facebook Fun!
- The Benefits of the New Facebook Timeline
It is time that you embrace the new Facebook Timeline - like it or not! Facebook is switching everyone over, so let's explore the many benefits of the Facebook Timeline. - The Many Types of Facebook Profile Pics
Everyone likes having a cute profile pic on Facebook. Have you ever wondered what type of photo you have on your page? Well check out this hub! - Facebook Status Updates That Are Better Left Unsaid
Many of us love sharing our experiences by posting Facebook status updates. However, some people like to share too much. - WWW Smackdown: The Facebook Fight
Plenty of people are angry at their friends and family for silly reasons. So why not fight about it on Facebook? Yes, show the world how immature you are and just start a Facebook fight right now! - Inappropriate Announcements for Facebook
Please remember, it is not nice to horrify your friends and family members with shocking news on Facebook. A nice phone call always prevents a terrible misunderstanding.
Comments
You know, you might be right about that one now that I think about it. Every now and then I see someone brave enough to use real names, but never the name of the person they insulting.
Thanks for the comment!
I enjoyed reading your hub. I agree with you. Some facebook statuses are just so annoying, especially the passive aggressive statuses. People could really act immature sometimes. It's really annoying to see my facebook feeds being flooded by negative aura. I have some friends who always post those types of messages. It really gets on my nerves that I rarely read feeds anymore.
This is so true. Sometimes I feel the need to read the feeds just to know what is going on, but sometimes I get very frustrated. If someone is not brave enough to say something to my face, then they should not say it online. Thank you for the comment!
"Gorillas! That is all I have to say." LOL.
The gorillas thank you for the comment. :-)
Very funny hub Jeannieinabottle....thanks for making me laugh on an otherwise not so fun day....voted up and funny
I am glad I could make you laugh. I've had some tough days recently myself, so I understand. Thanks for the vote up and the comment.
Great read! I was thoroughly entertained! :-)
Thanks for the comment!
Great hub! This should be required reading for anyone on Facebook! LOL :)
Thanks for reading my hub. Yes, maybe people do need to learn what to post (or what not to post!) on Facebook.
I am so guilty of the i hate my job status updates. the joke amongst my family and friends is, "oh veronica hate her job? whatever gave you that idea...first time I am hearing about it" lol. It's true that during the day FB is your only outlet for frustration but I am very careful about privacy to make sure nobody at my job sees it. I absolutely hate the "braggers" that make their life more exciting than what it is. I had a friend who constantly was like "i have the best boyfriend ever!" i finally put her on "hide" status and honestly it makes me think her relationship really sucks because if it was so great she wouldn't have time to post to FB she would be with this amazing boyfriend. People who do that just use their status to validate their pathetic lives by making other people feel bad
That is so true. If you have to constantly tell people how great your life is going, maybe it is really not so. And yes, Facebook can be a great outlet for frustration. I do complain quite a bit about my job. Sometimes Facebook is all I have. Thanks for the comment!
You are so right about facebook,but i also learned a lot from your hub thanks,and it was a great hub.
Thank you for your comment! Facebook is full of ridiculous status updates.
The mundane ones are the worst. I HATE the repost status updates! No kidding everyone hates cancer, children starving, war, etc. It's spam that clouds up my news feed. Ugh.. Lol, sorry. My comment sounds similar to the I hate work update.
Thanks for the hub!
Thanks for the comment. Trust me, I understand. Some updates are so annoying. It does not make me a bad person if I would rather post something fun and not some depressing reposted update. And your comment does not sound like a I hate work status. :-)
I LOVE this kind of sociological categorizing! Great hub!
I am glad you liked it. There are simply certain types of categories for every webpage. Thanks for the comment!
Oh yeah you definitely nailed it. This hub is an anthropological masterpiece!
Thanks!
Banging hub! This is the first time am reading a hubber who writes without forgetting his sense of humour. I'll be on my toes till your next hub is out! And by the way, i have a terribly short list of friends on face book. Any ideas as to how i can change that positively?
I am glad you enjoyed the hub. I am not sure how you can win over new people for your friend list though. Honestly, I have a rather short list, too. Thanks for dropping by!
Thanks for this hub Jeannie, I just commented on fb I need to learn it over again. This is very helpful for me. Now, if I can just figure out how to navigate there. Fantastic humorously written with flare, while giving me pause. I really don't know how it works. Thank you for a fun filled moment or two, cause to wander there later and look about, and discover their learning center - smile.
Thanks for checking out my hub! Good luck figuring out Facebook. They change it so much that no one can keep up anymore. It is about to change again soon, so don't get too attached to the way it looks now.
I would have to say I am guilty of a few of these haha. This was a great read, very informative.
Thanks! I am glad you enjoyed it. I am guilty of some of these, too, so don't feel too bad. :-)
this is an incredibly unique hub! I enjoyed it tremendously, very useful. I wonder if FB has access or will ever ban certain updates and if so, which ones have been banned already.
Thanks for reading and for the comment! I am happy you liked the hub so much. I don't know if Facebook ever bans status updates. I think they pretty much let people do whatever they want.
Lots of updates ..sometimes confusing
Yes, some updates can be very confusing. Thanks for the comment!
Voted up and awesome. I only update my facebook status when something is funny or amazing. My biggest pet peeve status update is on a thursday afternoon someone says "SO glad today is my friday! I'm off tomorrow!!" oye..
I know exactly what you mean! It is so annoying when people must rub everyone's noses in the fact that it is "Friday for them." So not cool! Thanks for the votes!
Great hub, it certainly made me laugh. It is oh so true as well, keep the good work up!
I am glad you liked it. Thanks for dropping by!
I absolutely loved, loved LOVED this! definitely on point!
Thank you! I am happy you enjoyed it. :-)
Hi Jean,
Nice explanation about the types of Facebook statuses, but for sometimes status updates it's not telling the truth instead lie, because it's Facebook!
This is true - there are many reasons a person posts an update. Sometimes people are just being honest! Thanks for reading my hub!
Happy birthday...one of my favorite hubs that you have written....sharing this link here and on my next favorite site...ChimeIn.
Thanks so much! I really appreciate it. I've gotten about 400 hits now. Obviously, I need to join ChimeIn. Thanks for the happy birthday wishes, too!
Great Great Hub. This is so true!
Thanks so much! Glad you enjoyed it.
You nearly narrowed down all the different types of updates, pretty observant. I try to keep mine on a jipper note & sometimes humorous to reflect my personality Everything shouldn't be for the public, ya know? Great hub.
Hehehe, this was hilarious! It's so true though. What about those annoying and really uninteresting updates that say "Bed time", or "Off to work I go"?
the-remedy - I know exactly what you mean. Lately, I have been trying to keep my status updates a little more optimistic. This is mostly because of this very hub. I realized I did whine way too much about work. Furthermore, you are right... everything shouldn't be for the public. Thanks for the comment!
MelChi - I often wonder why the mundane updates get posted as well. I guess some people believe they are really that awesome that people want to know their every move. I guess it must be fun to be them. Thanks for dropping by my hub!
Oh! This is such an interesting Hub on types of status updates. I specially liked the "The Ultimatum Status Update", it's really crazy. Thanks and voted up :)
I am happy you enjoyed it. I see "The Ultimatum Status Update" all the time now. People are constantly "cleaning up" their friend lists. I just basically only friend people I know and like, so I don't seem to have that issue. Thanks for the comment and the vote up!
Just saw you Hubber score of 100. Congrats :)
Thanks so much! I tends to go up and down a bit. It will probably be at 97 tomorrow. Hehe.
DrewCaveney 12 months ago
Very true! However I would say that people never, ever, put peoples names in status'. It's always 'That slut ruined my relationship with him!'. People are never brave enough to say peoples names in status'.